- Ever see Paint Your Wagon? The scene of the rain, the bloody bloody rain, a mud encased mining town with a bunch of wet, muddy miners, well that is what we look like this Memorial Day Weekend, wet and muddy and soggy. To be honest it did stop today, but what is unusual about that is that last Thursday our local weather people were forecasting rain for today and hot and sunny saturday and sunday, well it was just the opposite, Friday night, rain, Saturday day and night, rain, Sunday, rain off and on then rain last night, and today cloudy and overcast changing to sunny BUT sometime tonight more storms moving in for tonight and tomorrow!!!!
At 5 o'clock the weather people on tv said we are now 12 inches above normal for this year.The last several years we have been under, drought like conditions, but now we are way over, feast or famine I guess.
So I never was able to mow the yard and by the time I can it will knee high to me and that is not good. EEEhah, more fun! So how has your Memorial Day weekend been? Must admit we did have some good food, all of the bbq variety. Hot dogs on Saturday, pork ribs on Sunday and chicken breasts today, got our fill of bbq for a few days that is for sure.
We even stayed up late one night and watched some movies. Let keepers teens pick the movies last night, watched Footloose and Flashdance, looks like tonight it will be Benny & Joon with Jonny Depp, I have really come to appreciate him as an actor, so it should be enjoyable.
Tomorrow it is back to work, would rather stay home with keepers and wor on keepers korner but until we win the lottery have to keep on working.
happy trails to all
JM
Monday, May 26, 2008
RAIN, rain and more of it
Monday, May 05, 2008
Proud of Keepers
Today Keepers took their story about the former therapist to a local news reporter. He interviewed them about DID, about the former therapist, about what he did, etc. and Keepers gracefully answered his questions, gave him details and yes, even laughed with him. They were so worried about looking foolish, not only for themselves but for multiples in general. They know that some people will see them on local TV tonight and scoff, while others may make dumb comments and some will genuinely be interested and maybe, just maybe, another patient of a therapist who is also being a jerk will realize they can find help, that there are people who will listen and contact the state board or even the reporter.
It is less than two hours until the sotry will be on tv so they are anxiously awaiting it to air. Every indication is that he will handle it respectfully. After he and the cameraman left I asked her if she still wanted her face blurred as he had offered to do so I ran out to ask before they left and he said yes they could but by then she realized, she had nothing to hide. Do not blur out our face, we are who we are.
Have I said yet how proud I am of Keepers? I am. They continue to amaze me, how they have grown, how they have stood up for themselves, how they know that any way they are presented to the public, via internet, or newsletter or local tv or in a video on youtube, they are a representative of multiples everywhere. This is what saved them, and they have nothing to be ashamed of.
I know I am not ashamed of them in any way, shape or form, but I sure as heck am proud of them!
happy trails
JM
It is less than two hours until the sotry will be on tv so they are anxiously awaiting it to air. Every indication is that he will handle it respectfully. After he and the cameraman left I asked her if she still wanted her face blurred as he had offered to do so I ran out to ask before they left and he said yes they could but by then she realized, she had nothing to hide. Do not blur out our face, we are who we are.
Have I said yet how proud I am of Keepers? I am. They continue to amaze me, how they have grown, how they have stood up for themselves, how they know that any way they are presented to the public, via internet, or newsletter or local tv or in a video on youtube, they are a representative of multiples everywhere. This is what saved them, and they have nothing to be ashamed of.
I know I am not ashamed of them in any way, shape or form, but I sure as heck am proud of them!
happy trails
JM
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
MeMe Time
I’ve been tagged for a meme by SilveryLizard at Another Room. This is my first one so here goes.
Rules of the “Survivor Needs” Meme:
Please link back to the originating meme at Survivors Can Thrive, so people can see its origins, get ideas for their own self-care list, see who’s already been tagged, and maybe we can track how far this meme goes.
- List 25 needs and 5 wants. Try to restrict your needs list to things that have to do with being a survivor of some sort of abuse, assault, etc. Your list can be anything…you want!
- Use this list to remind yourself to get your needs met in the New Year.
- Pass on this meme and tag five people to play this meme with you.
Needs:
1.) I need to be with Keepers, the babies, littles, smalls, teens, adults, all of them.
2.) I need to be able to provide the support and assistance they need to keep on keeping on.
3.) I need to help them help others
4.) I need our goofy cats, Owen and Max
5.) I need to remember there is only so much I can do and do that to the best of my ability
6.) I need to be a friend to keepers and others I meet along the way
7.) I need down time
8.) I need to focus on the job at hand
9.) I also need to be silly more often instead of so serious
10.) I need my new tv, it is so cool
11.) I need to hear what others are saying
12.) I need to keep the car cleaner
13.) I need to get the oil changed more frequently
14.) I need to control my temper more
15.) I need to respect myself
16.) I need to be happy and focus on the next 5 minutes
17.) I need to feel like Keepers and JM are safe
18.) I need my favorite foods
19.) I need springtime
20.) I need my sleep
21.) I need to curl up with keepers each night in bed as we sleep
22.) I need to remember how awesome God's creatures are and give them love and care and respect, human and animal, all too often the animals more so
23.) I need a good juicy steak and mushrooms every once in a while
23.) I need a nice 7 and 7 every once in a while
24.) I need to get out once in a while for a drive or ride, up the River Road to watch eagles or just look at the river flowing
25.) I need to see and hear funny things to make me laugh
5 WANTS JM HAS
1.) To continue helping Keepers with Keepers Korner but full time
2.) To do that full time I want to win the lottery so a job is not necessary
3.) To buy a cool convertible, for those rides to meet Pastor or up the River Road
4.) To take Keepers to Ireland
5.) To meet more of the people we have met online via Keepers Korner
Now I tag Elvina at A Gift From WithinFriday, February 08, 2008
Kirkwood, MO Another view
As we watched the news last evening regarding the shooting in Kirkwood, MO several things came to the forefront. One was the fact that our son is a county police officer and every time keepers see or hear about a policeman being shot they go into a panic that it could be him. I imagine this is normal whether one is multiple or not, it has to be a fear of any one who knows a police officer, and even more for a mother.
The other thing was that the shootings were about three blocks away from where keepers ex T had his office so they were often in that neighborhood. In fact it was in their mind and mine that it could be him. A man labeled as a sociopath by fellow therapists, a man who had had similar issues with the same zoning commission, a man whose wife filed for divorce, a man who has had his license suspended for 3 years may well have snapped and gone the same route.
As I said in my previous post, there seems to be a lot Kirkwood today in this country of ours, and they all are needless and senseless. The agony they inflict on all involved is so damaging to the human spirit. These are not easy circumstances to overcome, for many they will never be overcome. The questions will linger, the whys will have no answers, the what could I have dones will make no difference, it will be too late. Unless we as a race, as a civilization, and a species, learn to control our anger, our hurt, our rage. I am by no means saying we need to bury our feelings but we do need to find safe and healthy ways to deal with our emotions and those who we are at odds with.
Killing each other is not the answer.
Safe and happy trails
JM
The other thing was that the shootings were about three blocks away from where keepers ex T had his office so they were often in that neighborhood. In fact it was in their mind and mine that it could be him. A man labeled as a sociopath by fellow therapists, a man who had had similar issues with the same zoning commission, a man whose wife filed for divorce, a man who has had his license suspended for 3 years may well have snapped and gone the same route.
As I said in my previous post, there seems to be a lot Kirkwood today in this country of ours, and they all are needless and senseless. The agony they inflict on all involved is so damaging to the human spirit. These are not easy circumstances to overcome, for many they will never be overcome. The questions will linger, the whys will have no answers, the what could I have dones will make no difference, it will be too late. Unless we as a race, as a civilization, and a species, learn to control our anger, our hurt, our rage. I am by no means saying we need to bury our feelings but we do need to find safe and healthy ways to deal with our emotions and those who we are at odds with.
Killing each other is not the answer.
Safe and happy trails
JM
Kirkwood, MO. 2/07/2008
Yesterday evening a way too often scene was reenacted right here in the heart of America. For whatever reason it happened, for whatever reasoning the gentleman was using in his obviously not in control state, his only way to resolve things was to take a gun and to start shooting, to take other lives and force those sworn to protect to take his.
In the end, Charles Lee "Cookie" Thornton lie dead in the Kirkwood City Hall, as did four of his five victims, the fifth was dead on the parking lot, his first victim and from whom he acquired his second gun with which he invaded the city council meeting room and began shooting. Two victims are in the hospital, a reporter whose wound was to the hand and the mayor of Kirkwood who has a gunshot wound to the head and has as of right now still not had surgery, why we do not know.
Keepers and I watched our TV as the local news channels reported on the situation, it began around seven in the evening and the information came in, slowly, some of it spilling over to this morning. On our local channel 5 it was obvious the newslady anchor lived in Kirkwood as she fought back the tears of reporting on this tragedy in her home town, a story that we knew tragically involved people she knew.
This morning as I looked on the computer, and there was another similar story, BATON ROUGE, La. (AP) -- A 23-year-old woman killed two fellow students with a .357 revolver in a classroom at a vocational college Friday, then committed suicide, police said.
These stories have become the norm instead of the unusual. In this great country where we sound our trumpet about our civil liberties and freedoms we can count that one about bearing arms in order protect ourselves and our families, those we love. Yet, that freedom also allows the taking of lives as people take that freedom and in their anger, their sorrow, their inbound demons, they take the lives of others and often themselves.
I know not what set these people off, I do know there have been times I would have loved to taken a baseball bat to some people and beat the you know what out of them for what they did to people I love and care for. But I did not.
I know I would have hated myself if I had, no matter how much it was deserved in my view. It is not up to me to punish anyone in that manner, to impart physical harm whether from my own fists, or my baseball bat or a handgun I could have in my possession to protect my home and those I love.
I have no right from God or my fellow man to take another's life without mine or my loved ones being in danger themselves. But, everyday we see and hear more stories like the two above. Here, where you live, anywhere across this country of ours. In large metropolitan areas, in the suburbs, in the country. It has become way to common, too every day, too "normal".
We shake our heads in disbelief but why I do not know. We should be getting used to this by now,
it happens everyday, over and over and over. Lives are taken indiscriminately. Futures are lost. Parents, children and loved ones are taken away in a second never to be held again. What could have been no longer can be. The expectations and hopes are now buried with the bodies of the victims and yes even the assassins. Anyone who was touched by or associated with the players in these dramas are forever tainted and disillusioned to some degree.
What we do to ourselves is beyond my comprehension. May God have mercy on us.
JM
In the end, Charles Lee "Cookie" Thornton lie dead in the Kirkwood City Hall, as did four of his five victims, the fifth was dead on the parking lot, his first victim and from whom he acquired his second gun with which he invaded the city council meeting room and began shooting. Two victims are in the hospital, a reporter whose wound was to the hand and the mayor of Kirkwood who has a gunshot wound to the head and has as of right now still not had surgery, why we do not know.
Keepers and I watched our TV as the local news channels reported on the situation, it began around seven in the evening and the information came in, slowly, some of it spilling over to this morning. On our local channel 5 it was obvious the newslady anchor lived in Kirkwood as she fought back the tears of reporting on this tragedy in her home town, a story that we knew tragically involved people she knew.
This morning as I looked on the computer, and there was another similar story, BATON ROUGE, La. (AP) -- A 23-year-old woman killed two fellow students with a .357 revolver in a classroom at a vocational college Friday, then committed suicide, police said.
These stories have become the norm instead of the unusual. In this great country where we sound our trumpet about our civil liberties and freedoms we can count that one about bearing arms in order protect ourselves and our families, those we love. Yet, that freedom also allows the taking of lives as people take that freedom and in their anger, their sorrow, their inbound demons, they take the lives of others and often themselves.
I know not what set these people off, I do know there have been times I would have loved to taken a baseball bat to some people and beat the you know what out of them for what they did to people I love and care for. But I did not.
I know I would have hated myself if I had, no matter how much it was deserved in my view. It is not up to me to punish anyone in that manner, to impart physical harm whether from my own fists, or my baseball bat or a handgun I could have in my possession to protect my home and those I love.
I have no right from God or my fellow man to take another's life without mine or my loved ones being in danger themselves. But, everyday we see and hear more stories like the two above. Here, where you live, anywhere across this country of ours. In large metropolitan areas, in the suburbs, in the country. It has become way to common, too every day, too "normal".
We shake our heads in disbelief but why I do not know. We should be getting used to this by now,
it happens everyday, over and over and over. Lives are taken indiscriminately. Futures are lost. Parents, children and loved ones are taken away in a second never to be held again. What could have been no longer can be. The expectations and hopes are now buried with the bodies of the victims and yes even the assassins. Anyone who was touched by or associated with the players in these dramas are forever tainted and disillusioned to some degree.
What we do to ourselves is beyond my comprehension. May God have mercy on us.
JM
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Something is Wrong In the State of Missouri
Keepers have been waiting 7 long years from when they first reported their former therapist to the State Committee of Psychologists for inappropriate and unprofessional behavior. Seven long years of him asking for and receiving at least 3 continuances, then the dispositions, the state investigators asking questions, the former therapist still contacting keepers, trying to talk them out of their suit, then the assistant Attorney General telling them how important it was to see this through, going to the state capital for the hearing which he did not even show up for!! Why you ask? Because his attorneys told him he had no chance of winning, the evidence was overwhelming. Even after the hearing it took another 7 months just to get the formal decision, guilty on 4 counts, then another wait for the discipline hearing in December of this past year and then another 6 weeks of waiting for the final discipline. The Attorney General told us they were asking that he be severely sentenced, and today we received the official sentence, 3 years suspended license and 5 years probation. His suspension is less than half the time keepers waited for this entire process to take.
Then he can go back to seeing patients. No mention of any other limitations, none whatsoever.
What follows is my letter to the Executive Director of the Committee:
Then he can go back to seeing patients. No mention of any other limitations, none whatsoever.
What follows is my letter to the Executive Director of the Committee:
Pamela G
Executive Director
Dear Ms. G
This is to advise you and the State Committee of Psychologists that the 17 years of inept
and devious therapy, which was upheld in testimony of my wife and the expert witness, as well as the 7 years of waiting while Mr. F got continuance after continuance because things were not convenient for him, has in my opinion, not been fairly evaluated in his disciplinary hearing.
can the committee?
Sincerely
John W
Saturday, January 19, 2008
Georgia football great Herschel Walker has multiple personalities
ATLANTA - Georgia football great Herschel Walker has multiple personalities - a revelation in an upcoming book that surprises the man who coached the 1982 Heisman Trophy winner.
"That's all news to me," former Georgia coach Vince Dooley said in Friday editions of The Atlanta Journal-Constitution. "All I know is whatever personality he had when he had the football was the one I liked."
I put this here with no other knowledge of the situation other than seeing this headline. It is my hope that with a celebrity personality more attention will be brought to the fact of what MPD/DID is and what needs to be done. I only hope it is positive attention.
happy trails
JW
 |  |
| |
| Legendary Georgia running back Herschel Walker has multiple personalities. |
"Breaking Free" will chronicle Walker's life with multiple personality disorder, according to Shida Carr, a publicist at Simon & Schuster.
Carr said the book will be published in August, but gave no other details and declined to provide excerpts.
In three seasons at Georgia, Walker led the Bulldogs to a 33-3-1 record, three straight Southeastern Conference championships and the 1980 national title. He won the Heisman as a junior, then left school a year early to sign with the now-defunct U.S. Football League.
Walker played for the Dallas Cowboys, Minnesota Vikings, Philadelphia Eagles and New York Giants. He has lived in Dallas since his playing career ended.
A former Georgia teammate also was caught off guard by Walker's revelation.
"I'm probably one of his closest friends and that's news to me," said Frank Ros, who was captain of Georgia's 1980 national championship team. "I knew he was working on a book but I just thought it was about football. He does 100 things at once and always has projects going on, but that blows me away."
The newspaper said Walker could not be reached for comment.
Multiple personality disorder, also known as dissociative identity disorder, is a rare mental condition in which one person has two or more distinct personalities, according to the Merck Manual of Medical Information.I put this here with no other knowledge of the situation other than seeing this headline. It is my hope that with a celebrity personality more attention will be brought to the fact of what MPD/DID is and what needs to be done. I only hope it is positive attention.
happy trails
JW
Monday, December 31, 2007
JM and Keepers Korner's Wishes to Our Friends and Visitors
To all of our friends and visitors Keepers and JM would like to offer these wishes for each of you in 2008:
continued personal growth
friends who understand and care
T’s who get it
family that takes time to listen and really hear you
less painful memories and many more good ones being created
less stress and more joy
more friends and less enemies
more healing and less pain
time to do what makes you happy
significant others in your life to share life with
to realize you deserve good things and are worthy of them
to be accepting of all your parts and to love your littles
protect your littles
be happy, be respected, be loved
You are all so very special to us and we wish you the best in 2008
peace and blessings
Keepers and JM
Saturday, December 22, 2007
Switching Time
Switching Time
The above link is to a book titled Switching Time, written by a psychiatrist it chronicles his therapy with a woman with 17 personalities. I have not read the book, and I will not comment on the review, part of it may well be triggering so if you want to click on the link and read it do so at your own risk. My point is the end of the review which holds what I consider to be a critical point for the survival and healing of anyone with multiplicity or is an avbuse survivor without the multiplicity, and I quote:
With her loving interest, Overhill's grandmother gave her a tiny spark of certainty — no matter how deeply buried — that she was lovable and worthy of respect.
These are critical to healing, to realize they are lovable and worthy of respect. They must believe it, and for them to believe it someone has to show them they feel that way about them. In this recounting of this ladies healing, it was her grandmother who showed her that, in Keepers life I hope it was I, and for everyone else out there who is on this healing journey, I pray someone who sees that in them will let them know that. Keepers and I often tell people that, but as someone on the other end of a phone or a keyboard, can they believe us? I don't know.
If you know someone who is on this path, please let them know you believe it to be true also, that they are lovable and that they are worthy of respect. To do that you may well give the most wonderful Christmas present ever.
Peace and blessings to all
JM
The above link is to a book titled Switching Time, written by a psychiatrist it chronicles his therapy with a woman with 17 personalities. I have not read the book, and I will not comment on the review, part of it may well be triggering so if you want to click on the link and read it do so at your own risk. My point is the end of the review which holds what I consider to be a critical point for the survival and healing of anyone with multiplicity or is an avbuse survivor without the multiplicity, and I quote:
With her loving interest, Overhill's grandmother gave her a tiny spark of certainty — no matter how deeply buried — that she was lovable and worthy of respect.
These are critical to healing, to realize they are lovable and worthy of respect. They must believe it, and for them to believe it someone has to show them they feel that way about them. In this recounting of this ladies healing, it was her grandmother who showed her that, in Keepers life I hope it was I, and for everyone else out there who is on this healing journey, I pray someone who sees that in them will let them know that. Keepers and I often tell people that, but as someone on the other end of a phone or a keyboard, can they believe us? I don't know.
If you know someone who is on this path, please let them know you believe it to be true also, that they are lovable and that they are worthy of respect. To do that you may well give the most wonderful Christmas present ever.
Peace and blessings to all
JM
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
The Spirit of Christmas
The following true story was told to us today by a very dear friend, and we were so touched we asked her to write it and with her permission, allow us to post it so others can read a true Christmas story.
My Christmas Story
We are creatures of habit for the most part–all humans are. We tend to stick to routines. There’s a certain amount of comfort in following a routine–knowing what to expect and when to expect it. You may take the same route to work every day and find yourself behind the same car at the same stop light on most days. The only reason you might notice this car amid hundreds of others is because of a funny bumper sticker or unique license plate. You see the same school bus and the same group of kids waiting for that bus–and the only day you might notice the bus or the kids is if you have to stop for the blinking red lights on that bus and wait for those kids to load up so you can be back on your way.
On the days that I work, I leave my house at the same time and follow the same route. I am usually behind a silver Toyota Camry with a Butler High School decal on the trunk. I have noticed that whenever she is behind me, she takes the first opportunity to get in the left lane and pass me–so she always ends up in front of me. Today I noticed she had two new Christmas decals on either side of the usual orange Butler bulldog paw. Not a big thing to notice, but something different that caught my eye. It won’t be far up the road before she slows our lane of traffic down to make a right turn into a small development. In my mind, I wave goodbye and say “I’ll see ya tomorrow.”
There is somebody else I’ve noticed from time to time. A little boy, about 9-years-old, waiting at a bus stop out in front of one of those pay-by-the-week motels just around the corner from my office. Sometimes I see his mother waiting with him and sometimes I imagine she gets him to the bus stop and heads to work herself. I have found myself wondering how it is that they ended up living there. The mother looks like she’s had a hard life and when looking at her for the brief moments as I pass by, I wonder if she’s running from something or someone.
I live in the south where it doesn’t get terribly cold and we rarely see snow. But it gets cold enough. Yesterday the temperature was 22 degrees when I left my house. I had to scrape a good layer of frost off my windshield before I could leave home and I was thankful I had remembered my gloves. Today the temperature was a bit warmer at 38 degrees, but it was raining…a cold rain. Both days I have noticed this little boy more than usual because he was not wearing a coat of any kind. All he had on against the cold and rain was a sweatshirt. Today he was jumping up & down and shaking himself trying to stay warm as the rain continued to come down on him.
I was only blocks away from work and I began to cry. I knew today had to be different–not only for me but for that little boy. In the next few minutes I had a plan.
When I got to work, I immediately went into my supervisor’s office and told her I had an idea that I wanted to tell her about. We hadn’t yet made any definite plans for an office Christmas party and we usually get each other something frivolous that we don’t really need. I was still crying as I told her about this little boy without a coat in the cold & rain. I asked her if we could bypass those $5 & $10 gifts this year and instead pool the money together to get this little boy a coat, hat & gloves. I could see how touched she was as she reached into her wallet and pulled out some money. I went around to several other coworkers and many were no longer dry eyed and all of them willingly donated—some giving me all the cash they had in their wallets at the time.
I work for the corporate office of a small retail company. We have 6 stores in the area and we sell shoes, boots, dancewear, horse equipment and even some outerwear. So when I approached the boss, he told me he would give me some gloves for the boy and that would be his donation. A short while later, he called me back to the warehouse and he had a selection of coats he had pulled out. He told me to pick one that I thought would fit the boy and he would sell it to me at his cost (which is roughly ½ of the retail price). He said he’d rather do that & see the kid get a really nice coat than to have me go to a discount store and pay more money for a cheaper coat. I picked a nice one out of the pile…a Wrangler coat with flannel lining and a hood. He later brought the pair of gloves he had promised me to my desk so all that was left to get was a hat. After paying for the coat, I still had $71 of donated money to spend on the little boy. I went to Walmart after work and found a hat and a few sweet treats to put in his gift bag to make it even more special. I also got his mother a box of chocolates and put the remaining $55 on a Walmart gift card for the mother to use for groceries or presents.
My plan was to leave for work early tomorrow morning and try to catch the mother walking her son to the bus stop so I could give them the gift bags since I didn’t want to approach the boy if he was out there by himself. But I also wanted him to have the coat to wear in the morning in case it was bitterly cold once again. I decided to drive to the motel this evening and ask whoever was in the management office if they knew where the little boy who waits out front for the bus lives. I was a bit nervous to knock on someone’s door like this, but I wanted him to have his coat before morning. As I pulled into the driveway of the motel, this boy & his mother were walking towards me. They were headed out for dinner I assume. The boy had a short sleeve shirt on and the sun was going down. I quickly did a U-turn and pulled up behind them and opened my window. I had to holler a bit for the woman to hear me over the noise of traffic. I got her attention and she stopped to talk to me. I got out of my car and asked her if this was her little boy and if he was the one I see at the bus stop every morning. She hesitantly answered yes and then wanted to know why I was asking. I told her that I see him every day and I was worried that he had no coat–especially these last two days when it was so cold. I told her that my coworkers and I wanted to do something for them for Christmas and since I had no idea if she would be offended or not, I asked her to please accept the gifts in the spirit that they were being given. She said that he did have a coat but that it is at her other son’s house and they have no way to get it. I told her that she didn’t have to worry about that any longer, as I handed him the giant bag filled with the warmth that every child deserves. She began to cry…and I did too. As I handed her the small gift bag with the chocolates and gift card, she hugged me and thanked me. As she stepped back, I felt two small arms around my waist and I looked down to see this little boy with his arms wrapped around me. I hugged him back and wished him a very Merry Christmas.
I look forward to my drive to work tomorrow-I hope to see him at the bus stop, wearing his new coat. I still don’t know his name, and they don’t know mine…and that’s the way it should be. My routine was broken today and I’m so thankful for that. By giving him the gift of a warm coat, I can now truly feel the warm spirit of Christmas all around me.
-bjy-
12/19/07
Thank you for sharing bjy, and for living the spirit of Christmas
jmSaturday, October 27, 2007
The Pink Dress
I want to thank our wonderful friend Pastor Brown for sending this to us. A lot of things get passed all over via the internet, this is one we were really glad to receive, hope you enjoy it also.
Happy and peaceful trails
JM
The Pink Dress
There was this little girl sitting by herself in the park.
Everyone passed by her and never stopped to see why she looked so sad.
Dressed in a worn pink dress, barefoot and dirty, the girl just sat and watched the people go by.
She never tried to speak.
She never said a word.
Many people passed by her, but no one would stop.
The next day I decided to go back to the park in curiosity to see if the little girl would still be there.
Yes, she was there, right in the very spot where she was yesterday, and still with the same sad look in her eyes.
Today I was to make my own move and walk over to the little girl.
For as we all know, a park full of strange people is not a place for young children to play alone.
As I got closer I could see the back of the little girl's dress.
It was grotesquely shaped.
I figured that was the reason people just passed by and made no effort to speak to her.
Deformities are a low blow to our society and, heaven forbid if you make a step toward assisting someone who is different.
As I got closer, the little girl lowered her eyes slightly to avoid my intent stare.
As I approached her, I could see the shape of her back more clearly.
She was grotesquely shaped in a humped over form.
I smiled to let her know it was OK; I was there to help, to talk.
I sat down beside her and opened with a simple, "Hello."
The little girl acted shocked, and stammered a "Hi " after a long stare into my eyes.
I smiled and she shyly smiled back.
We talked until darkness fell and the park was completely empty.
I asked the girl why she was so sad.
The little girl looked at me with a sad face said, "Because, I'm different."
I immediately said, "That you are," and smiled.
The little girl acted even sadder and said, "I know."
"Little girl," I said, "you remind me of an angel, sweet and innocent."
She looked at me and smiled, then slowly she got to her feet and said,
"Really?"
"Yes, you're like a little Guardian Angel sent to watch over all the people walking by."
She nodded her head yes, and smiled.
With that she opened the back of her pink dress and allowed her Wings to spread, then she said "I am."
"I'm your Guardian Angel," with a twinkle in her eye.
I was speechless -- sure I was seeing things.
She said, "For once you thought of someone other than yourself. My job here is done".
I got to my feet and said, " Wait, why did no one stop to help an Angel?"
She looked at me, smiled, and said, "You're the only one that could see me," and then she was gone.
And with that, my life was changed dramatically.
So, when you think you're all you have, remember, your angel is always watching over you.
Happy and peaceful trails
JM
Saturday, October 20, 2007
Huh?
Adolescents need support during family breakups
By Joene Hendry Fri Oct 19, 4:14 PM ET
NEW YORK (Reuters Health) - Family breakups take a toll on adolescents, who have high rates of psychological and social problems, including substance abuse, behavioral disorders, anxiety and depression, according to a report in the journal Pediatrics
In addition, the psychological and social distress shown by separated and divorcing parents can play a significant role in their adolescent children's respond to the family breakup, study findings suggest.
"What is the most deleterious for the children is the atmosphere in which the separation occurs and the deterioration of the family relational processes and not the separation in itself," Dr. Christelle Roustit, of the Research Group on the Social Determinants of Health and Healthcare, and Universite Pierre et Marie Curie, Paris, told Reuters Health.
Roustit and colleagues administered questionnaires to 2,346 adolescents, divided into age groups of 13 and 16 years old, who participated in the Social and Health Survey of Children and Adolescents in Quebec, Montreal. In addition, surveys were also completed by 1,983 parents.
Overall, substance abuse, including alcohol, was approximately two-times higher in these adolescents compared with adolescents who were not going through a family breakup. Although seen in both groups, the rate of substance abuse was considerably higher among the 16-year olds.
Oppositional attitudes and behaviors, such as fighting, damaging property and theft were increased in both age groups. While Roustit noted that paternal support helped mediate the association between family breakup and psychological distress, it did not affect oppositional behavior.
Levels of depression and anxiety also were higher than normal in both age groups. In particular, the risk of suicide attempts was three- to four-times higher among 13 year olds, compared with 16 year olds, Roustit said. These behaviors, however, were modified by parental support.
Higher rates of psychological distress reported by parents were linked with adolescent psychological distress as well as the adolescents' acts of defiance, fighting, vandalism, animal cruelty, theft or other violations of the law, but not with adolescent alcohol use or substance abuse.
Adolescent psychological distress in both age groups was also strongly associated with witnessing violence between parents.
Preventing maladjustment disorders among adolescents during times of family break ups, the investigators conclude, may require legal interventions that encourage divorce mediation or joint custody, as well as social interventions that support children and families with their readjustments.
SOURCE: Pediatrics, October 2007.
Huh? I thought all of this was a given. You mean to tell me no one ever realized the effects this stuff had on kids before this report? If so no wonder there are so many people with problems and no wonder so many therapists are no help, they didn't know!!!!!!!
My gosh, and thank the heavens that now they know!! Good Lord I hope they can figure out what to do to help. I can almost imagine that we will see in the news in a week or so that using alternate fuels would cut down our dependence on foreign oil or that Elvis had died or that children under six should not be given cough suppressants, imagine!!Thank God we have people working on these stories because without their breaking this news to us, where would we be???
I shudder to imagine
Happy trails,
JM
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
This is Ridiculous!!
They say the wheels of justice move slowly but this is ridiculous. It isn't even the legal system, it is a State Board of Review but it must have been created by the same people who created our legal system. It takes forever and a day to get anything done from initial complaint to final discipline.
As many of you know, Keepers filed a complaint against a former therapist approximately 7 years ago. Hearing after hearing was postponed as he had this to do or that to do and each time he was granted a rescheduled hearing. Unbeknownst to him Keepers actually got stronger as time went on, and even though there were times they considered dropping it, either a) the Assistant Attorney General reiterated the importance of keepers standing up to this man or b) Keepers themselves regrouped and forged onward.
This past January the hearing finally occurred, and yes he had filed for another continuance, and this time Keepers told the Attorney General's office, it's now or never, we are not going to b eput off again. The continuance was denied, the hearing was held, and he did not show, so the hearing proceeded with all of the testimonies including Keepers.
At that point the Judge stated, he is guilty on these charges.
After the hearing the Assistant Attorney General told us how the process worked from here. We are sure we were not told all because they did not want to exasperate us further or truly did not realize the wheel needed a really good lube job! They now had 30 days to inform him of the findings, he had 30 days to rebut the findings then they got another 15 days to rebut his rebut and then it would go to a panel.... a panel who would review what has transpired up to this point!!
My God in heaven, if Judgement Day is anything like this it will take eternity to find out if we are upward bound or downward bound and that doesn't include continuances!
Anyway, we were told the final findings would be on line so we kept checking day by day, week after week, until I got a wee bit po'd and wrote a letter to the Attorney General asking how they could or would expect others to come forward and file complaints against abusive therapists when this was how it was handled? I never received an answer but within 2 weeks the decision was up on line, a matter of public record! Hoorah, finally, justice is served, yahoo...no...wait a sec...what about the discipline, the punishment for his God awful, not to mention abusive and incompetent (state's word, not mine) therapy? Will we get a letter, will it be public record also, what? Couldn't find anything so yesterday I sent another letter to the State Board asking how we will find out his discipline.
Get this....the board will have another hearing!!!! On December 7th!!!!! The hearing will be to determine his discipline, evidently he can debate his punishment against the board and then...and then...they will deliberate again! There will be no decision on his discipline on that day either. The email response said we would receive a letter from the Board outlining the disicpline levied against him, they did not say how long that will take.
So I ask you, is this ridiculous or not?
We are confident that by the time the discipline is official, available, after debate and such, it will have been at least a year since he was initially found guilty as charged. A year!!! Doesn't that seem to be a wee bit long? Supposedly this man is no longer sewing any patients, but what if he was? What if he is? That means that for 7 years he would have been able to see more patients, do more irreparable harm to others, and that to me seems ridiculous. Forget the 7 years from filing to hearing, once that hearing said he was guilty some sort of restriction should have been placed on his license immediately, it could have been temporarily suspended or some such method put in place to make his contact with any other patients cease until after a final decision was determined and in such cases why shouldn't it be moved up to the front of the line?
When I look at the States website I see eight, 8, cases or complaints against psychologists, psychiatrists since the year 2000, which is the earliest decision we can see. Thus I assume that complaint started in around 1993! Surely the board can speed up the process once the guilty or not guilty decisions come in. I understand they are supposed to be protecting their profession's reputation by reviewing complaints and investigating them, which they did a thorough job of, but for crying out loud let's have some consideration for the victims in these situations and I am not talking about the therapist, I am talking about the patients and their families who are seeking to stop therapists from abusing their power, and make therapy safe for others who need it, not make it a breeding ground for incompetence and egos that are in need of some really good therapy themselves.
If you really want to monitor and insure that your profession is clean and competent, no not competent, excellent, don't prolong what the patients have gone through to ridiculous lengths with your excessively long and endless red tape. That is not fair to the patients, they have already endured the worst your profession can offer, isn't it about time they received the best your profession can offer?
JM
As many of you know, Keepers filed a complaint against a former therapist approximately 7 years ago. Hearing after hearing was postponed as he had this to do or that to do and each time he was granted a rescheduled hearing. Unbeknownst to him Keepers actually got stronger as time went on, and even though there were times they considered dropping it, either a) the Assistant Attorney General reiterated the importance of keepers standing up to this man or b) Keepers themselves regrouped and forged onward.
This past January the hearing finally occurred, and yes he had filed for another continuance, and this time Keepers told the Attorney General's office, it's now or never, we are not going to b eput off again. The continuance was denied, the hearing was held, and he did not show, so the hearing proceeded with all of the testimonies including Keepers.
At that point the Judge stated, he is guilty on these charges.
After the hearing the Assistant Attorney General told us how the process worked from here. We are sure we were not told all because they did not want to exasperate us further or truly did not realize the wheel needed a really good lube job! They now had 30 days to inform him of the findings, he had 30 days to rebut the findings then they got another 15 days to rebut his rebut and then it would go to a panel.... a panel who would review what has transpired up to this point!!
My God in heaven, if Judgement Day is anything like this it will take eternity to find out if we are upward bound or downward bound and that doesn't include continuances!
Anyway, we were told the final findings would be on line so we kept checking day by day, week after week, until I got a wee bit po'd and wrote a letter to the Attorney General asking how they could or would expect others to come forward and file complaints against abusive therapists when this was how it was handled? I never received an answer but within 2 weeks the decision was up on line, a matter of public record! Hoorah, finally, justice is served, yahoo...no...wait a sec...what about the discipline, the punishment for his God awful, not to mention abusive and incompetent (state's word, not mine) therapy? Will we get a letter, will it be public record also, what? Couldn't find anything so yesterday I sent another letter to the State Board asking how we will find out his discipline.
Get this....the board will have another hearing!!!! On December 7th!!!!! The hearing will be to determine his discipline, evidently he can debate his punishment against the board and then...and then...they will deliberate again! There will be no decision on his discipline on that day either. The email response said we would receive a letter from the Board outlining the disicpline levied against him, they did not say how long that will take.
So I ask you, is this ridiculous or not?
We are confident that by the time the discipline is official, available, after debate and such, it will have been at least a year since he was initially found guilty as charged. A year!!! Doesn't that seem to be a wee bit long? Supposedly this man is no longer sewing any patients, but what if he was? What if he is? That means that for 7 years he would have been able to see more patients, do more irreparable harm to others, and that to me seems ridiculous. Forget the 7 years from filing to hearing, once that hearing said he was guilty some sort of restriction should have been placed on his license immediately, it could have been temporarily suspended or some such method put in place to make his contact with any other patients cease until after a final decision was determined and in such cases why shouldn't it be moved up to the front of the line?
When I look at the States website I see eight, 8, cases or complaints against psychologists, psychiatrists since the year 2000, which is the earliest decision we can see. Thus I assume that complaint started in around 1993! Surely the board can speed up the process once the guilty or not guilty decisions come in. I understand they are supposed to be protecting their profession's reputation by reviewing complaints and investigating them, which they did a thorough job of, but for crying out loud let's have some consideration for the victims in these situations and I am not talking about the therapist, I am talking about the patients and their families who are seeking to stop therapists from abusing their power, and make therapy safe for others who need it, not make it a breeding ground for incompetence and egos that are in need of some really good therapy themselves.
If you really want to monitor and insure that your profession is clean and competent, no not competent, excellent, don't prolong what the patients have gone through to ridiculous lengths with your excessively long and endless red tape. That is not fair to the patients, they have already endured the worst your profession can offer, isn't it about time they received the best your profession can offer?
JM
Sunday, October 07, 2007
A General Catching Up and Look Forward
Well it has been several weeks now since the States decision was posted to their website about Keepers former therapist. As I think most of you know he was found guilty of all of the charges and we now await the Boards discipline to be enacted. He may get a slap on the wrist he may get his license removed forever which would only be fair and protective of anyone else he may come across if allowed to continue practicing. On a more personal note his wife has filed for divorce from him and we can only guess how much this had to do with it. What a shame! Yeah right! Sorry but he deserves some crap for all he did.
This entire thing has had its affect on Keepers, sometimes they feel bad in a way, other times they feel he is getting what he deserves, so it is a roller coaster ride that I believe they now see as he was bad, he harmed them, he screwed things up for not just keepers but for the entire family and as such he deserves any punishment he gets, from the state or his wife or his colleagues.
What else is cooking? Little Keeperskorner, one of Katie's goats named after Keeperskorner is now preggers and will have her first babies soon! Keepers were so happy for the good news!! Keepers also get to name them. There are about 6 goats named after different keepers, so thanks again Katie. We will send you some old stuffed animals for the baby goats soon!!
We are trying to get Keepers blog moved back to the website so it is all in one location, Andrzej our webmaster has found 3 software programs he is encouraged by and will delve into them and see which one might be easiest to use to accomplish our goal.
We are getting ready for Christmas at Keeperskorner by beginning to purchase stuffed animals and such to send to little alters at Christmas time. We are also sending out letters asking for donations from companies of discontinued stock or any other items they may be willing to donate that we could use as gifts.
We are concerned for many of our cyber friends who are in so many ways our family now. Several are having health issues of a physical nature along with the multiplicity and or abuse they have survived. Some have had to find new therapists some have had therapists on extended vacations and all of this is very, very troubling and disruptive for them. Some have felt suicidal, some have simply tried to shut down and become a zombie of sorts, none of which works. Keepers have tried to be supportive in every way possible short of giving advice. Ooops, this one piece of advice is given, "contact your T".
We are still getting new visitors to Keeperskorner which is great, being able to talk with and help support new people who are reaching out is super. Some of them just need anyone to listen, some have lost insurance or whatever to pay for therapy and need someone to talk to. Some have a T on vacation or whatever and reach out to us in their alone time. Pastor Brown says this is our calling for now, to help those in need with what keepers and I can give them. He feels there is more coming but he does not know what, but tells us to be ready for it when it gets here!
Weather wise we are in much the same boat as a lot of other people, not enough rain, way below normal and here we are in October, our normal high is about 75 or so, so we are looking temps in the low 90s with high humidity! One of the more respected weathermen here in town is saying we are running a month behind in the weather cycle. We won't get October weather until November and so on. Looks like he is right so far. We have our air on to keep the humidity tolerable and to be able to sleep comfortably, we usually have it off by August or September unless we run into a short term heat up, but this in October is way unusual for us.
Later this afternoon we will blog with one of our dear friends in the UK, it always interesting to talk with her and we know she can use someone to talk to as she has several family members with bad health matters right now and she is trying to be supportive and helpful to one and all, but always puts herself last, so we have to remind her to take care of herself also!! She is one of our oldest friends here on the internet and she is like a sister to Keepers and myself.
Well, nothing else really going on I can think of right now, nothing earth shattering, didn't win the lottery, again, didn't have PCH come our door with a giant check, again, didn't find a parcel full of cash alongside the road, again, so tomorrow it is back to work. Someday I will do all my work here with Keepers in Keeperskorner, I just wish it would be sooner than later, so if anyone out there is really rich and is looking for someone to help benefit with a kindly annual donation, we here at Keeperskorner are your kind of people!!!
To each and every one of you, happy trails!
JM
This entire thing has had its affect on Keepers, sometimes they feel bad in a way, other times they feel he is getting what he deserves, so it is a roller coaster ride that I believe they now see as he was bad, he harmed them, he screwed things up for not just keepers but for the entire family and as such he deserves any punishment he gets, from the state or his wife or his colleagues.
What else is cooking? Little Keeperskorner, one of Katie's goats named after Keeperskorner is now preggers and will have her first babies soon! Keepers were so happy for the good news!! Keepers also get to name them. There are about 6 goats named after different keepers, so thanks again Katie. We will send you some old stuffed animals for the baby goats soon!!
We are trying to get Keepers blog moved back to the website so it is all in one location, Andrzej our webmaster has found 3 software programs he is encouraged by and will delve into them and see which one might be easiest to use to accomplish our goal.
We are getting ready for Christmas at Keeperskorner by beginning to purchase stuffed animals and such to send to little alters at Christmas time. We are also sending out letters asking for donations from companies of discontinued stock or any other items they may be willing to donate that we could use as gifts.
We are concerned for many of our cyber friends who are in so many ways our family now. Several are having health issues of a physical nature along with the multiplicity and or abuse they have survived. Some have had to find new therapists some have had therapists on extended vacations and all of this is very, very troubling and disruptive for them. Some have felt suicidal, some have simply tried to shut down and become a zombie of sorts, none of which works. Keepers have tried to be supportive in every way possible short of giving advice. Ooops, this one piece of advice is given, "contact your T".
We are still getting new visitors to Keeperskorner which is great, being able to talk with and help support new people who are reaching out is super. Some of them just need anyone to listen, some have lost insurance or whatever to pay for therapy and need someone to talk to. Some have a T on vacation or whatever and reach out to us in their alone time. Pastor Brown says this is our calling for now, to help those in need with what keepers and I can give them. He feels there is more coming but he does not know what, but tells us to be ready for it when it gets here!
Weather wise we are in much the same boat as a lot of other people, not enough rain, way below normal and here we are in October, our normal high is about 75 or so, so we are looking temps in the low 90s with high humidity! One of the more respected weathermen here in town is saying we are running a month behind in the weather cycle. We won't get October weather until November and so on. Looks like he is right so far. We have our air on to keep the humidity tolerable and to be able to sleep comfortably, we usually have it off by August or September unless we run into a short term heat up, but this in October is way unusual for us.
Later this afternoon we will blog with one of our dear friends in the UK, it always interesting to talk with her and we know she can use someone to talk to as she has several family members with bad health matters right now and she is trying to be supportive and helpful to one and all, but always puts herself last, so we have to remind her to take care of herself also!! She is one of our oldest friends here on the internet and she is like a sister to Keepers and myself.
Well, nothing else really going on I can think of right now, nothing earth shattering, didn't win the lottery, again, didn't have PCH come our door with a giant check, again, didn't find a parcel full of cash alongside the road, again, so tomorrow it is back to work. Someday I will do all my work here with Keepers in Keeperskorner, I just wish it would be sooner than later, so if anyone out there is really rich and is looking for someone to help benefit with a kindly annual donation, we here at Keeperskorner are your kind of people!!!
To each and every one of you, happy trails!
JM
Saturday, September 29, 2007
Six Flags and Little Keepers and JM
Today, for the first time in little Keepers lives they got to go to Six Flags and be themselves! Big Keepers took a back seat to littles, except when we stopped for a smoke every once in a while or when a call came in on the cell phone, besides that it was little keepers and JM all day long!!
This guy was at the entrance creating these huge bubbles for everyone to admire.
We had so much fun, riding rides, drinking lemonade, taking pictures, laughing, eating funnel cakes, practically walking right onto the rides the first several hours we were there because they just weren't busy yet. The very first roller coaster ride we had our only casualty of the day as keepers hat was taken off their head on the first turn, never to be seen again! As we went by any of the numerous stands there they checked out the hats for a replacement but Terrence found something better in his opinion, see below!
yep!!! Terrence got a Superman cape!!! He will have to share it with Super Terrence but now he has the cape!!
Every ride brought forth a different little laughing and gasping as we rode ride after ride, even some very little keepers came out to squeal in delight at this never before adventure that was theirs to savor, to remember for a lifetime!
I think the Log Flume was their favorite ride overall but if you asked them I think it would be whichever one they just got off of when you asked them. The only disappointment ride wise was the Moon cars were being renovated so the ride was gone. It will be there next year so we will enjoy it then!
View from top of Log Flume:
I would like to thank my employer for making this possible today as the entire finance group was offered this opportunity at Six flags, they paid for our parking, the park admission, a free picture and a free lunch (this was the only downer in this regard, the food was pretty blah, food last year was a lot better!) So we had to stop for our funnel cake earlier than we planned on doing it but it was so darned delish, funnel cake with warm cinnamon apple topping and we left exactly one bite! I asked one of the littles if she was having fun and she heard me but she didn't answer me and I began to laugh which brought out a big asking what was going on and I said I asked if Itty Bit was having fun but she just kept on eating the funnel cake as if to say, "Not now, silly! Can't you see we have a funnel cake to eat!"
Well to make a long story short, after seven hours there it was decided it was time to head home, a super duper time was had by all and it was time. So home we came and guess what...as I write they are on the couch dozing and perhaps dreaming about thier wonderful day at Six Flags, a day for littles.
Happy Trails to all
JM
This guy was at the entrance creating these huge bubbles for everyone to admire.
We had so much fun, riding rides, drinking lemonade, taking pictures, laughing, eating funnel cakes, practically walking right onto the rides the first several hours we were there because they just weren't busy yet. The very first roller coaster ride we had our only casualty of the day as keepers hat was taken off their head on the first turn, never to be seen again! As we went by any of the numerous stands there they checked out the hats for a replacement but Terrence found something better in his opinion, see below!
yep!!! Terrence got a Superman cape!!! He will have to share it with Super Terrence but now he has the cape!!Every ride brought forth a different little laughing and gasping as we rode ride after ride, even some very little keepers came out to squeal in delight at this never before adventure that was theirs to savor, to remember for a lifetime!
I think the Log Flume was their favorite ride overall but if you asked them I think it would be whichever one they just got off of when you asked them. The only disappointment ride wise was the Moon cars were being renovated so the ride was gone. It will be there next year so we will enjoy it then!
View from top of Log Flume:
I would like to thank my employer for making this possible today as the entire finance group was offered this opportunity at Six flags, they paid for our parking, the park admission, a free picture and a free lunch (this was the only downer in this regard, the food was pretty blah, food last year was a lot better!) So we had to stop for our funnel cake earlier than we planned on doing it but it was so darned delish, funnel cake with warm cinnamon apple topping and we left exactly one bite! I asked one of the littles if she was having fun and she heard me but she didn't answer me and I began to laugh which brought out a big asking what was going on and I said I asked if Itty Bit was having fun but she just kept on eating the funnel cake as if to say, "Not now, silly! Can't you see we have a funnel cake to eat!"Well to make a long story short, after seven hours there it was decided it was time to head home, a super duper time was had by all and it was time. So home we came and guess what...as I write they are on the couch dozing and perhaps dreaming about thier wonderful day at Six Flags, a day for littles.
Happy Trails to all
JM
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
Saturday, September 22, 2007
No Longer Waiting
It is here, arrived a few days ago, and there it was in black and white, 16 pages of the State's decision regarding the charges filed against the former therapist of Keepers. I was not home when it got here so Keepers read it and parts of it to me over the phone. It's effects have already been felt here in our home. What is has done in his we do not know nor do I really care. All I know is that on all charges the State of Missouri found him guilty! The State Board of Psychologists will levy the discipline within 30 days, supposedly, but we all know there is red tape and such but we know he is guilty according to his peers, the Attorney General's office, the expert witness and soon it will be on the State's site listing those who have been disciplined and charged with infractions of the licensing committee's standards.
Sadly it had adverse effects on Keepers almost right away. Reading excerpts from evidence brought forth renewed a lot of old feelings, of him telling them their perceptions were all wrong, that they could not exist in the real world, that only he understood them and cared about them, that I was a bad person only using them, that he was a multiple too so only he could "get it".
To say Keepers, especially the littles, were thrown for a loop would be a big understatement. Ever since the document arrived here they have struggled to regain their feelings of worth, of being good, of having value. That was how far reaching his influence over them was and is to some degree. But, they are recovering. Day by day they are getting a little stronger.
They are receiving supportive comments via their blog and email and phone from their fellow multiples who look at them say "you did good" and "you stood up for all of us and won" and "that took guts" and "thank you for being strong enough to go through with this", all valid points, all true comments, all indicative of Keepers friends and "family" who stand by them.
This was seven long years, years full of self doubt, of fear of him, and part of that fear was brought forth in his reply to the decision, he alluded that Keepers had done things that were not proper and that they were allowed certain privileges by the state in their testimony, which is quite interesting since he wasn't even there to hear their testimony since he chose not to appear because as he stated in a letter to the judge, "my attorneys advise that I cannot win this decision so it is fruitless for me to appear". He then "volunteered to retire his license" but the AG said, "no" we want to prosecute so we can take away his license. It seems if he voluntarily gives it up he could come back and request it be reinstated after some amount of time and the state would have no reason not to. This way that avenue is closed to him. Way to go AG!
In review, he "is subject to discipline because in his treatment of a patient, 1) he wrote a letter of a sexual nature to the patient 2)he reinforced the separateness of her multiple personalities 3) he failed to maintain appropriate boundaries between himself and Keepers 4) his primary focus in his therapy was abreactive work which was inappropriate and could have harmed the patient."
That is it in a nutshell, the 16 pages provide some of the backup for their findings. Some of that was what triggered littles especially. Since then I am trying to reinforce that there was nothing in the 16 pages that said keepers did this wrong or that wrong, everything was on what he did wrong. In addition to his not showing up for the hearing he did not sign his rebuttal. The State board made note of this saying that in their attempts to discern the truth they often have to weigh each persons testimony and decide who they feel is being truthful, his not showing up nor even signing his rebuttal made all of his comments irrelevant in his support and in fact he did corroborate much of what Keepers testified to so the evidence was overwhelmingly against him.
I am very proud of Keepers for not giving up on this procedure, I know it has hurt in many ways, it tore their hearts apart in many ways. They felt used, abandoned, neglected, tricked, you name it. But, they stood up, they went there, they testified and in so doing they won the respect of the judge, the expert witness the assistant Attorney General and many of their internet friends as well as Pastor Brown and myself. This was not easy for them to do. They were hit with more repercussions when that 16 page doc got here. When the discipline is announced that may well trigger more feelings and reactions. All I know is that I hope they are proud of themselves, they deserved to be heard, by authorities, and they were! Their littles now know that the older keepers do care and will do all they can to protect them. They know now that there are people who believe them, people who care about how they are treated and who really respect them.
Keepers and I hope that this man will never have the opportunity to harm a patient again, that others who have been through similar circumstances may well find the strength to report an abusive and harmful therapist if they have one. We also hope that once the annual list of license revocations is put out there and the posting is made of the findings that other T's may reconsider how they treat their patients and correct any bad behaviors they may have for their sakes and most importantly for the sake of their patients.
How often reporting a person in authority to a state licensing committee or board works I do not know, but we do know now that it can work, and that gives me reason for hope after all.
Congrats to Keepers for doing the right thing, for seeing it through, you did good!!!!
Happy trails from here on out!!!
JM
Sadly it had adverse effects on Keepers almost right away. Reading excerpts from evidence brought forth renewed a lot of old feelings, of him telling them their perceptions were all wrong, that they could not exist in the real world, that only he understood them and cared about them, that I was a bad person only using them, that he was a multiple too so only he could "get it".
To say Keepers, especially the littles, were thrown for a loop would be a big understatement. Ever since the document arrived here they have struggled to regain their feelings of worth, of being good, of having value. That was how far reaching his influence over them was and is to some degree. But, they are recovering. Day by day they are getting a little stronger.
They are receiving supportive comments via their blog and email and phone from their fellow multiples who look at them say "you did good" and "you stood up for all of us and won" and "that took guts" and "thank you for being strong enough to go through with this", all valid points, all true comments, all indicative of Keepers friends and "family" who stand by them.
This was seven long years, years full of self doubt, of fear of him, and part of that fear was brought forth in his reply to the decision, he alluded that Keepers had done things that were not proper and that they were allowed certain privileges by the state in their testimony, which is quite interesting since he wasn't even there to hear their testimony since he chose not to appear because as he stated in a letter to the judge, "my attorneys advise that I cannot win this decision so it is fruitless for me to appear". He then "volunteered to retire his license" but the AG said, "no" we want to prosecute so we can take away his license. It seems if he voluntarily gives it up he could come back and request it be reinstated after some amount of time and the state would have no reason not to. This way that avenue is closed to him. Way to go AG!
In review, he "is subject to discipline because in his treatment of a patient, 1) he wrote a letter of a sexual nature to the patient 2)he reinforced the separateness of her multiple personalities 3) he failed to maintain appropriate boundaries between himself and Keepers 4) his primary focus in his therapy was abreactive work which was inappropriate and could have harmed the patient."
That is it in a nutshell, the 16 pages provide some of the backup for their findings. Some of that was what triggered littles especially. Since then I am trying to reinforce that there was nothing in the 16 pages that said keepers did this wrong or that wrong, everything was on what he did wrong. In addition to his not showing up for the hearing he did not sign his rebuttal. The State board made note of this saying that in their attempts to discern the truth they often have to weigh each persons testimony and decide who they feel is being truthful, his not showing up nor even signing his rebuttal made all of his comments irrelevant in his support and in fact he did corroborate much of what Keepers testified to so the evidence was overwhelmingly against him.
I am very proud of Keepers for not giving up on this procedure, I know it has hurt in many ways, it tore their hearts apart in many ways. They felt used, abandoned, neglected, tricked, you name it. But, they stood up, they went there, they testified and in so doing they won the respect of the judge, the expert witness the assistant Attorney General and many of their internet friends as well as Pastor Brown and myself. This was not easy for them to do. They were hit with more repercussions when that 16 page doc got here. When the discipline is announced that may well trigger more feelings and reactions. All I know is that I hope they are proud of themselves, they deserved to be heard, by authorities, and they were! Their littles now know that the older keepers do care and will do all they can to protect them. They know now that there are people who believe them, people who care about how they are treated and who really respect them.
Keepers and I hope that this man will never have the opportunity to harm a patient again, that others who have been through similar circumstances may well find the strength to report an abusive and harmful therapist if they have one. We also hope that once the annual list of license revocations is put out there and the posting is made of the findings that other T's may reconsider how they treat their patients and correct any bad behaviors they may have for their sakes and most importantly for the sake of their patients.
How often reporting a person in authority to a state licensing committee or board works I do not know, but we do know now that it can work, and that gives me reason for hope after all.
Congrats to Keepers for doing the right thing, for seeing it through, you did good!!!!
Happy trails from here on out!!!
JM
Friday, September 14, 2007
Waiting to See It in Black & White
As many of you regulars may well know, Keepers filed a complaint against their therapist of 17 years, about 7 years ago. We were notified by the lawyer from the AG office just a few days ago that the decision is final, he was found guilty on all five charges put forth in the complaint. We are waiting for the paper copies of the decision to get here so we can read it for ourselves!
This past January we travelled to our state capitol so keepers could testify in the often postponed hearing. That had happened 3 or 4 times. Unbeknownst to the former T everytime he got it postponed he was in fact doing himself in because keepers were getting stronger and more determined as time went by.
We met with the lawyer from the Attorney General's office a couple of times before the hearing and were told he may not show up for the hearing after all. Seems he had tried to get this one rescheduled also but this time Keepers told the AG lawyer that if it was cancelled again they would not testify, that 7 years of this was more than enough. They conveyed that to the judge and the judge agreed, no more postponements!
So, on the day of the hearing, the judge was there, the AG lawyers were there, the expert witness was there the state investigator was there and we were there. The lawyer for the AG and the expert witness, who keepers spoke with for about 20 minutes before the hearing, were very supportive of keepers, they did all they could to reassure her all would be just fine. If he did show up they would do all they could so he did not harass or frighten the littles on the stand.
The judge waited for 15 minutes past the scheduled start time, since the T had not shown up yet. When the judge began they read a letter from the T, stating he may not be there because "keepers were too fragile and he wanted to do what was best for keepers", yeah right, and then he added that "he had been advised by two lawyers he had employed that he stood no chance of winning! Maybe with appeals and more time he could get it overturned but they both said "you will not win". I think that means we had way too much evidence against him, which we gave to the AG, the investigator came up with some of his own and then the "expert" witness added his two cents worth that in his opinion the T had done nothing short of manipulation, deception and impeded the recovery of keepers. for 17 years for his own twised reasons.
Pretty strong stuff! He was found guilty on 5 separate charges, to be honest I do not remember the wording of the charges. The AG recommended the most stringent penalties be set forth. That comes from the State Psychological Board in about 30 days. We can onl7y pray that they will see fit to honor the AG suggestions and recognize the harm this man caused in his 17 years and even thereafter. There are things keepers may never recover from. The brainwashing he did to them is not completely undone, some of the things he convinced them of are still not "undone". The effect he had on keepers relationships with me and our children and other therapists will never go away. Keepers and I have worked through many of ours. They would never see another T I am sure.
Whatever his punishment, or discipline as they want to call it, is, it will not be enough. I spoke with the T who helped Keepers file their complaint those 7 years back, I left her a message that he had been found guilty on all 5 charges. She called me today, happy to hear that but wondering what the discipline will be. In her opinion he belongs in jail. What he did to keepers emotionally, physically, mentally, and to their relationships with others was that serious, that destructive, the heinous.
There was many a time I wanted to take a baseball bat to this person but I was always afraid I would get caught and keepers would have no one at their side. Sort of the same way I felt about all of her abusers, take a baseball bat to them and whale the crap out of them. Maybe the state will use their bat on him.
He deserves it.
Happy trails to all of the rest of you
JM
This past January we travelled to our state capitol so keepers could testify in the often postponed hearing. That had happened 3 or 4 times. Unbeknownst to the former T everytime he got it postponed he was in fact doing himself in because keepers were getting stronger and more determined as time went by.
We met with the lawyer from the Attorney General's office a couple of times before the hearing and were told he may not show up for the hearing after all. Seems he had tried to get this one rescheduled also but this time Keepers told the AG lawyer that if it was cancelled again they would not testify, that 7 years of this was more than enough. They conveyed that to the judge and the judge agreed, no more postponements!
So, on the day of the hearing, the judge was there, the AG lawyers were there, the expert witness was there the state investigator was there and we were there. The lawyer for the AG and the expert witness, who keepers spoke with for about 20 minutes before the hearing, were very supportive of keepers, they did all they could to reassure her all would be just fine. If he did show up they would do all they could so he did not harass or frighten the littles on the stand.
The judge waited for 15 minutes past the scheduled start time, since the T had not shown up yet. When the judge began they read a letter from the T, stating he may not be there because "keepers were too fragile and he wanted to do what was best for keepers", yeah right, and then he added that "he had been advised by two lawyers he had employed that he stood no chance of winning! Maybe with appeals and more time he could get it overturned but they both said "you will not win". I think that means we had way too much evidence against him, which we gave to the AG, the investigator came up with some of his own and then the "expert" witness added his two cents worth that in his opinion the T had done nothing short of manipulation, deception and impeded the recovery of keepers. for 17 years for his own twised reasons.
Pretty strong stuff! He was found guilty on 5 separate charges, to be honest I do not remember the wording of the charges. The AG recommended the most stringent penalties be set forth. That comes from the State Psychological Board in about 30 days. We can onl7y pray that they will see fit to honor the AG suggestions and recognize the harm this man caused in his 17 years and even thereafter. There are things keepers may never recover from. The brainwashing he did to them is not completely undone, some of the things he convinced them of are still not "undone". The effect he had on keepers relationships with me and our children and other therapists will never go away. Keepers and I have worked through many of ours. They would never see another T I am sure.
Whatever his punishment, or discipline as they want to call it, is, it will not be enough. I spoke with the T who helped Keepers file their complaint those 7 years back, I left her a message that he had been found guilty on all 5 charges. She called me today, happy to hear that but wondering what the discipline will be. In her opinion he belongs in jail. What he did to keepers emotionally, physically, mentally, and to their relationships with others was that serious, that destructive, the heinous.
There was many a time I wanted to take a baseball bat to this person but I was always afraid I would get caught and keepers would have no one at their side. Sort of the same way I felt about all of her abusers, take a baseball bat to them and whale the crap out of them. Maybe the state will use their bat on him.
He deserves it.
Happy trails to all of the rest of you
JM
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
The Return of Wendys
We just drove by there, it was about 9:15 PM and there were cars in the drive thru completely encircling the restaurant. The inside was full. We are beginning to wonder if they are giving away free food or paying people to come back. Surely there weren't that many people who missed it to the point of waiting in line for God knows how long! Is there?
This weekend we drove by it 3 or 4 times, and every time it was jam packed! To be honest, keepers and I like Wendy's food, when it is hot and prepared correctly it is pretty good, especially for fast food and we would both take it over Mickey D's anytime or Burger King.
But, we won't spend 30 minutes waiting for a chance to order a burger and fries no matter how good it is.
So I wonder, why do people wait in an extremely crowded parking lot or drive thru for a burger and fries or a baked potato or a frosty? Am I missing something? Is this the part of America I am supposed to be a part of and just can't get it? When we used to go out with our children for a meal, which was most of the times we got together with our son and his family, they had no problem waiting 45 minutes or longer at a restaurant waiting for a table. I could never see it. I could understand it even less when the food was overpriced and usually not very tasty at all on top of waiting for what seemed like forever for less than average food.
If keepers and I go into a restaurant and they say we have a wait of over 15 minutes, we go somewhere else. We cannot see any reason to wait when it always exceeds the time they say it will be and if they are that busy the service is often poor and the food prepared sloppily or takes forever and is often messed up in some manner.
I will not tip poor service or poor food and I will tip for good service and food, I have had a daughter work the restaurant business as a waitress and a bartender and she lived on the tips, not the hourly wage, but that is a separate blog for the future. Anyway, at a restaurant we often visit we had terrible service one night, the food was cold, the appetizers and the main course because the waitress was not paying attention, not because she was busy. Luckily it was pizza for the main so we just took it home heated it up later but the onion rings which are normally stupendous there and the cheese garlic bread were both lukewarm at best and cooled off fast at the table. When we left I did not tip her at all. As we approached our car on the parking lot the owner followed us out of the restaurant and asked us, did we forget to tip our waitress or what?
This was the first time this had ever happened to me but I told him, the service was terrible which in turn caused the food to be cold very fast and that we could not even get her to refill our drinks, we got another waitress to do it. He knew we were regulars, not real often but enough that he remembered us. He apologized for her service, or lack of, and we told him, we have been coming here for years and this was the first time I ever did this, and how we loved their food and atmosphere. Ever since then, and this was a good 5 years ago, he always comes by our table and asks us how we are and how is the food and such. We always get good service and we imagine he tells whoever is waitressing us that if they want their tip, they had best deserve it.
So how in the hell did I get to tipping from Wendys, beats me!!! All I know is now I am hungry! Got some chicken wings thawing out for later, will throw them in the wing fryer made for hotwings and keepers and I will have a snack before we head for bed. Or I guess I could run down to Wendy's....nah.
Happy trails
JM
Sunday, September 02, 2007
A Dream Come True
Well, to say that yesterday was an awesome day would be an understatement. Yesterday keepers and I fulfilled several dreams in one day on a special day. It was our anniversary so we did three things , we had our house and studio blessed by Pastor Brown, after that we held a small service in our office and renewed our wedding vows and our commitment to each other, after 37 years we finally renewed our vows and then we had an adoption ceremony, service, where Pastor blessed our adoption of the little keepers into the family of myself and big keepers. Now, all keepers feel as though they belong, none are just tagging along because an adult keeper married me, we are all family and as such we have a new bond, even stronger than before!
Here are some pictures for those who are interested:
here is the office at Keeperskorner, we used the desk for the flowers and unity candle.
here is a picture of keepers roses, i am sorry to say i have not keepers many in our marriage but i know these were very special to them.
this is the vase for little keepers flowers, they wrote their names on it and now the artificial flowers will be a remembrance vase for them to always have. Oh yes I almost for the lolly bouquet!!
this is Beth, below getting ready to place her flowers and some of the littles she cares for, thier flowers in the vase
keepers and me after the ceremonies and before we headed to a fine Mexican restaurant with pastor Brown for a delicious supper
Pastor Brown and Keepers after the ceremonies
Little Keepers vase after everyone put their flowers in
I really feel that keepers and I are even stronger than before, closer than before, more dedicated to each other and keeperskorner than ever before. Pastor Brown was the first clerical person we found who understood and accepted keepers multiplicity and our desire to have big keepers and me adopt all of the little keepers and make all keepers a part of our family in the eyes of God. Little Keepers have a peace they have never known before, that alone makes it all worthwhile and very precious.
To all of the Keepers, thank you for allowing and wanting me in your lives and for giving me the chance to love you, ALL of you.
Always
JM
Here are some pictures for those who are interested:
here is the office at Keeperskorner, we used the desk for the flowers and unity candle.
here is a picture of keepers roses, i am sorry to say i have not keepers many in our marriage but i know these were very special to them.
this is the vase for little keepers flowers, they wrote their names on it and now the artificial flowers will be a remembrance vase for them to always have. Oh yes I almost for the lolly bouquet!!
this is Beth, below getting ready to place her flowers and some of the littles she cares for, thier flowers in the vase
keepers and me after the ceremonies and before we headed to a fine Mexican restaurant with pastor Brown for a delicious supper
Pastor Brown and Keepers after the ceremonies
Little Keepers vase after everyone put their flowers in
I really feel that keepers and I are even stronger than before, closer than before, more dedicated to each other and keeperskorner than ever before. Pastor Brown was the first clerical person we found who understood and accepted keepers multiplicity and our desire to have big keepers and me adopt all of the little keepers and make all keepers a part of our family in the eyes of God. Little Keepers have a peace they have never known before, that alone makes it all worthwhile and very precious.To all of the Keepers, thank you for allowing and wanting me in your lives and for giving me the chance to love you, ALL of you.
Always
JM
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